"My peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid." John 14:27
I received an email this morning that I both expected (and had been dreading) and didn't expect (which caught me off guard and really devastated me). I don't want to talk about it on a public blog in detail--it's not really my place to do that--but it was heartbreaking to receive, just from a longstanding emotionally invested point of view.
So, once again I called my prayer warriors and gave them an update. But instead of going into battle, as we did last time, it was more like, "Please help me to have peace through this."
And here I sit, having just had a friend surprise me on her way home (the same one who prayed with me over the phone last week, actually!), with my inbox full of wisdom and compassion sent to me throughout the day, and I feel so much more at peace than before. There really is something to be said about "bearing one another's burdens in love," not to mention the work that only God can do on one's heart. But something my friend from India sent me really stood out to me and I think it's so beautiful (referencing the healer I met via couch surfing*):
"Trust God and his messengers who are brining you these messages from around the world that there is something beautiful waiting for you but you can't access it if you hold on to something else."
I love the irony that she herself is one of these messengers from around the world. The fact that she also did a Tarot reading on my behalf and then sent me the results--which were lovely, and full of hope--was so sweet. (Side note to my mom: one of the cards she pulled was a "Rochelle" card!)
Meanwhile, I binge watched a sermon series from #JohnThePortlandPastor (my friend Sheri and I created this hashtag because we're fan girls) and it's JUST. SO. GOOD. And then one of my friends who watched the soccer game with me this weekend texted me what is now the cover photo of this blog, the artwork of someone participating in "Inktober," because he said it reminded him of me.
With the exception of a missing Greek flag somewhere in the illustration, YES. That is me!
One small cartoon girl facing a giant dessert, head on. Fearless.
Anyway, for all of these things and for all of these people, and for God's immeasurable grace and peace, I am thankful.
*another friend also made reference to the healer, saying, "Do you think God was preparing you for what was to come by sending her?" Yes, actually, now that you point it out.